my heart is so not into this. i have always prided myself on leaving my issues at the door. when i come to work-whatever is going on outside of work-or whatever issues are going on at work-it gets left outside of work. b/c i am here for my patients. they need me. they need my love and they need my spirit. they need my calm sense of being. but im having a hard time doing that. i couldnt sleep last night b/c this whole work thing has me all keyed up. i havent been myself all day b/c its bothereing me. and people are noticing. im not my normal bubbly self....and i hate it. and no matter how hard i try to shake it-i cant. im not good at faking.
last night i laid in bed and prayed to God-asking Him to help me trust Him....I keep forgetting that i need to let Him lead me...i can only control so much. so often i try to control it all-and i forget that i cant....so, i am doing my best to let it be and let Him have control, but in the mean time, i am miserable. i just dont want to be here-i love my patients, but i want to lay in bed and just disappear from it all for a while.
7.15.2008
so not into this
Posted by startsinmynose at 7:08 AM
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3 comments:
Hey hon, I'm so sorry to hear about your job and I hate that you are miserable. I know the feeling. I will keep you in my prayers. Please let me know if there is anything I can do for you. I love you!!!!!
You did the right thing... I know it's really hard sometimes, but you really do just have to trust in God. Too bad we can't all have quite the same view as He does. Good luck.
Oh, Precious! I am so sorry to hear that you're feeling this way right now. But what a beautiful spirit you have, realizing that your patients need you. Keep gettin' your pray on, lady--and I'll do the same for you, okay? It IS hard sometimes to remember that God is the driver, especially during those times we want SO badly to be behind the wheel. Breathe, pray, rest, and be gentle with yourself. He's totally watching out for you. Don't ever doubt that.
with love (and all kinds of prayin') from Pittsburgh...
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